round 2

       So after competition I told myself I would allow myself a day of "free unclean eating" and then move on... of course its a lot harder than I thought it would be such a big list of what I want ... so little time hah

      I decided I am going to go ahead and compete again next month... most of the judges when I asked stated that I need to show more confidence as well as just a bit more muscle tone. This next competition is only 4 weeks out however I am going to be no longer working (as we are moving to texas next month) .. so I will be able to put more time into my routines.... (I was burnt out quickly with work and eventually started slacking on my actual lifting and lost a lot of muscle mass by just doing cardio).

     So far Sunday I had pizza, a bag of rolos a box of Charleston chews (both my absolute favorite)... churches chicken, and a few other snacks here and there (gahh I cannot believe fig newtons are so high in calories )I generally do not count calories but 90 cals for two small cookies...whaaa?

     then yesterday I started eating clean again ..had my normal serving of cream of wheat and eggwhite and blueberries although ended up munching down on more chocolate....... it is now morning and I am craving a burrito from habenero grill .. which is also on my list but being 32 days out I dont want to push my limits :/ (we'll see)..it goes to show (and I have learned this over and over again) that I am not an individual who can just have a taste of something... now I would never deprive myself.. I dont look at it that way.. I am excited to eat the way I do .. I feel great, but during competition prep I am going to do all I can to make sure I am at my best~

last night I hit the gym for a little under an hour.. 30 mins worth of legs ..and 20 mins worth of cardio.... this saturday I meet back up with my coach and we will figure out what all needs to happen diet wise to get me going ... I am going to push myself harder this 2nd time around just because I know I can and should not have excuses of lacking sleep anymore~

 I can easily say I put on 3-4 lbs of weight... more or less water weight, but weight all the same... Im not worried, as I have a few areas I am going to focusing on and I am sure I will have no problem getting to where I need to be. I just need to truly focus on what the heck I am doing~

burrito or not...hmmmm